Clothing Optional

[caribou_gen]

It seems odd to be my age and to suddenly learn that I have difficulty clothing myself. It started with my students being very blunt that they thought I was thin and that I wore frumpy, unflattering clothes. They were all set to buy me some new trousers to replace the ones I regularly wear.

Next, I discussed my students' observations with a couple of teachers and they agreed with the students. They told me I wear a lot of clothes that are too large. Speaking with other friends, they all agree.

So why hasn't anyone mentioned this to me before?

I've now got the challenge of changing my perceptions about what size I am. I was a somewhat larger person at the end of high school and used to regularly wear size 16. Who knows if I was even wearing the right size at that point. Today, I was given some trousers that fit remarkably well and are a size 11. I don't think I've really lost a lot of weight, maybe only 10 lbs. I think what I need to to do is change my mindset and stop buying clothes by size but rather by how they fit.

I almost feel embarressed to admit that I'm getting fashion tips from What Not to Wear.

Comments

[therealjae.livejournal.com]

You were bigger than you are now, sure, but you were *never* a size 16. I think you've always worn clothes that were too big for you, actually. I've never mentioned it because I thought you liked the baggy look.

You're welcome to go through my closet and try things on if you like them!

-J

[boubabe.livejournal.com]

I think I probably did fit a size 16 in *something* since sizes range so much depending on what your buying and who made it. From there, I just kept on buying the same size assuming that was my size.

As I said to purplejavatroll:

I think I was a little less comfortable with my body when I was younger. I'm feeling more confident/relaxed about it now and I more willing to show off my form. It helps that I'm becoming more fit.

I guess I'm just a little surprised that everyone except me has realized I wear clothes that are too large and I'm only just discovering it.

Mind you, I haven't had a full length mirror in a long, long time.

[therealjae.livejournal.com]

At the heaviest point in my own adult range, I weigh ~180 and am a size 14 (still *well* below a 16). At my lightest, I weigh ~135 and am a size 8. That's a huge fluctuation in size without too huge a fluctuation in weight, which is why I think it's so important to keep clothes in various sizes.

You said your new pants were a size 11, but I actually think you'd be perfectly comfortable in the 10s I own. I'm a 12 right now, and I'm pretty sure you're quite a bit thinner than I am at the moment. You should seriously try on some of my stuff, if only to get a better sense of what size you should be wearing!

-J

[purplejavatroll.livejournal.com]

I thought you just liked the baggy look, I guess. I tend to ignore sizes, since they usually are madly inconsistent from shop to shop anyway. Take someone you trust to be honest with you, let them tell you if they fit or not, if you want a second opinion.

You'll look fine no matter what you wear, anyway!

pjt

[boubabe.livejournal.com]

I think I was a little less comfortable with my body when I was younger. I'm feeling more confident/relaxed about it now and I more willing to show off my form. It helps that I'm becoming more fit.

I guess I'm just a little surprised that everyone except me has realized I wear clothes that are too large and I'm only just discovering it.

Mind you, I haven't had a full length mirror in a long, long time.

[purplejavatroll.livejournal.com]

I've often deliberately worn clothes that were very baggy to hide my figure, too. Especially useful in male dominated environments, at times, if you want them to remember that you have a brain. But it's nice to sometimes just wear something that's form fitting, too. Options are always good.

I think more people notice clothing than one thinks. The most surprising people will comment on a new pair of shoes or pants sometimes.

pjt

[eeyore-grrl.livejournal.com]

in my "new" apartment the bedroom has two double sliding door closests with mirrors for doors. i am a bit more concious of what i wear. but to work i PURPOSELY wear clothes that are way too big... but then again my students are mentally disabled but still have the hormones of 15-22 year olds.

[boubabe.livejournal.com]

My students are 12-14 yr olds which adds an interesting dynamic to what I choose to wear to work.

[eeyore-grrl.livejournal.com]

yup. the beginning of raging hormones.

[kelc42.livejournal.com]

I always thought you looked fine, never gave it much thought. I suppose I thought you dressed more for comfort than for high fashion, but that seemed to better suit you anyways, some people (like you) don't have to dress up to look good. Of course you also look good on those rare occasions when you do dress up, no reason I have seen for you to hide your appearance behind frumpy clothes. Sometimes clothing a size or two too big is very comfortable, and if thats the case then do it, who cares what anyone else says. If you want to change your clothing style then go for it, but as a jeans and t-shirt person I won't try to give any advice there.

[mouseman.livejournal.com]

I second most of what KelC said. I never particularly noticed. I've always seen you, not your clothes, and that's what was important to me. I suppose if I'd actually thought about it, I'd have assumed you preferred comfortable, as well.

But then again ... Remember my comment ... nations would fall. :>

[boubabe.livejournal.com]

I don't look bad but I could look better. I do dress for comfort and that will never change, but how you dress does affect how you are treated and how you feel about yourself. If I look good, I tend to feel good and more confident. Jill gave me a pair of cords that hug my curves a little more and I feel awesome wearing them.

I'll still dress down while I'm relaxing, but my work clothes can use a once over.

[mac-arthur-park.livejournal.com]

Don't be embarrassed. I didn't have a pair of jeans that fit properly until last fall. And I have Toni to thank for the fact that I actually buy clothes that fit now.

[eeyore-grrl.livejournal.com]

can i borrow her so i can learn to dress?

[mac-arthur-park.livejournal.com]

You'll have to ask her but it's fine by me.

[boubabe.livejournal.com]

Wish you lived closer!

[eeyore-grrl.livejournal.com]

wombat share time! :)

[queensheba.livejournal.com]

I wouldn't mention something like that (their clothes seeming too large) to someone unless I considered them a close friend, or thought they were especially receptive to it. One of my coworkers always wore pants that were super-short and very high-rise, but a lot of them also had holes in them, so I thought she might not have the money to replace them. Another friend always wears super-baggy clothes, but I *know* it's a money issue for her - she shops at Goodwill and gets what she can get.

[puppytown.livejournal.com]

I totally get fashion tips from What Not to Wear, too. It's a great show. For a long time, I wore whatever was cheapest to buy regardless of how it fit, because I was always going to lose weight and I could wear my old clothes again. And I felt like crap.

After watching that show, I've gotten over that and I feel SO MUCH BETTER when I wear clothes that fit me properly, are flattering and vaguely stylish.

I admit that I noticed that your clothes were way too large, especially those brown cords! I figured that was what you preferred to wear when relaxing.

I'd go shopping with you, if you wanted.

[boubabe.livejournal.com]

That's exactly it - I feel better wearing clothes that fit nicely.

It's those brown cord pants that arethe worst offenders, eh? I finally got to look at myself in those in a full length mirror and was just so surprised at how horribly they fit. One friend referred to them as pantaloons. They are incredibly comfortable but I don't think I'm going to wear them as "dress-up" clothing any more.

I think I might take you up on a shopping excursion sometime. Not only would it be fun with you, but I tend to like your fashion sense, too.

[purpletigron.livejournal.com]

We're not looking a confusion between UK and Canadian size 16, are we?

bou bou bou

[meowster.livejournal.com]

i don't even have to see you to know that you look fabulous. you always do :o)

if it makes you feel any better, i've learned quite a lot from WNTW, lol... plus, they just don't make clothes how they used to.

i have the same predicament. i never know what looks good and what doesn't. to solve that, i usually go shopping with a friend that i trust. it helps if they have fashion sense that you respect or admire. just remember, that no matter what you wear, be true to yourself in the style you choose or you'll never be comfortable in the outfit.

[wstockall.livejournal.com]

I probably have no business posting anything here, but I've never noticed a problem with the way you dress. Plus, I think you should wear whatever makes you comfortable, other people's opinion be damned. Sadly, I often think other peoples' opinions shouldn't matter :-). It's one of my worst characteristics.

[hubris2.livejournal.com]

Wearing the 'correct' sized clothes is a good thing, I guess. Less important than not wearing clothes that are too small!

Funny...nobody has ever come up to me and told me that I was thin, and wore unflattering clothes. Does that mean I am not....or simply that nobody has yet told me?

While I've never seen you in work attire, the casual clothing you normally wear is attractive and comfortable. I think many women with hourglass figures tend to dress to hide things - we men can be awful pigs sometimes. Speaking of which...there hasn't been much discussion about the title you chose for this topic. Perhaps we should host a 'clothing optional' housewarming party. You wouldn't have to worry about your clothes fitting...

Ignore my husband :)

[goldenpaw72.livejournal.com]

Anyway, I'm typically in the same boat. I wear over-sized clothing becuase 1) it's comfortable and 2) I'm trying to hide my shape and size (much to hubris2's chagrin).

Anyway, wear what is comfortable and what you think looks nice. Yes, size in itself should not be an issue. Maybe you and I should go shopping someday :). We could each find one outfit that flatters, that promotes and helps our self confidence and makes us look sexy (long as it's not lingerie) LOL.

clothing/perception

[(Anonymous)]

Why don't you just wear what makes you comfortable and happy? If you're dressing for what other people want, then there's a problem. Don't be afraid to try new things, but on the other hand, if it doesn't work for you, do what YOU want. Be self-confident, rememeber, peer pressure was left in the school days, and dress in a garbage bag if that's what turns your crank.